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I have always believed that "success" is the measure of the person I am. Hence, spending hours in the library and subsequently, slogging away behind the office desk was a given. Anyone who complains of long hours and hard work is deemed weak. I subscribed to the saying: If you are not Somebody you are Nobody and I worked hard at making sure everyone knew I was Somebody.
Well, I was Somebody all right, but I soon learnt that being Somebody can be lonely. To my colleagues I was "the threat", to my subordinates I was the "B#$%@", to my friends I was "too busy"and to my family I was "absent". If a name describes a person, then I truly did not like who I have become. The Somebody I have become is not at all the person I had worked so hard to be.
After 18 years of studying and 10 years in the working world, I find myself divorced and living alone and realizing that "success" is measured on many fronts, but more importantly it does not make a person. A few weeks ago, Pastor Chew spoke on the book of Exodus and how many of us are slaves to Egypt, building pyramids for ourselves and forgetting the promised land. This truly hit home.
I am starting with small gestures, taking time to call friends up just to see how they are, remembering their birthdays and spending time with my family. I recently took a day off work just to take my nephew to Genting Highlands! To many it wouldn't mean much, for everyone who knows me, it's almost unheard of. (Remember I was the type who use to take pride in not taking leave and never calling in sick.) But the look on his face at the rides and how he still talks about that day being James' Day with a twinkle in his eyes, I know that we will all remember that trip for a long time.
Today I am called by nicer names, "Yi Yi", "best friend", "terribly lazy sleepy one" ;-)
5 comments:
Your nephew just mentioned again today, that he would like to go on that "high-high, fast-fast swing" in Genting Highlands again! :-)
Take heart, my dear, that God has truly called you and by His grace, you see what many, many others have failed to see. And I am grateful, that you see it at this young age, where you can still do so much to get it right. I think of many who found it too late, or worse, still haven't found it. I am thankful, very thankful.
Welcome home to your abundantly life dear.
Jacque,
Look at Jame's smile!!! I think he prefer the lazy one :-)
Hey "Yi Yi", "best friend","terribly lazy sleepy one"
Welcome back and praise God for His faithfulness and amazing grace!
Yes, be assured that you're already a 'Success" in His eyes the second He created you. He loves you unconditionally for who you are and not what you are.
You are His Somebody.
Let us all at Cornerstone be your companions as you begin this journey for we are also heading for the same place, the "Promised Land"!
Thank you for sharing, a great testimony for those who are still building their pyramids!
God bless you!
I used to think that way too...BUT after what i have gone through in my life, I finally realised I am nothing without GOD...He is my only source of hope and security..
He never leaves us nor forsake us..
Truly, GOD is awesome !
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